Sad But True; or, Once Again A Surprise

Another breakthrough by Rover in response to a photo of me I left for him in his birthday card (his birthday was Sunday, but I did not see him, have not seen him in some time):

"Thank you for the picture. I really like it because it looks like you're looking right at me. And when you look at me like that, I feel as if you can see right into me and know what I'm thinking. It's like you're a mind reader, and I like your peering into me like that sometimes. I liked that even before we had so many problems. And I had no problem with that until my also being in love with you-know-who became an issue. And that's the only part I don't like you peering into now, because it upsets you so much. And that's still part of me unfortunately. I still haven't resolved that. I'm going to. And I don't want us being ruined by it, and I think that the time apart now is because I gotta find out what.... you can never be invisible again. I'm just struggling with a lot of stuff right now. It's not that I love you any less or desire you any less...."

I don't know if that makes sense to you out there in Blogland, but it's the first time he's admitted that he needs to find out what he's doing with Lips, that he needs to resolve their issues one way or another. The message was a sad one, but I'm glad he is resolved not to see me anymore until things are square with her, until they are done or until he can tell me that he has committed to her.

That may sound strange, and it makes me really sad, but it is one of the first things about this relationship between us that seems right and as it should be.

I still morn the loss of him, but I am okay. Tonight, on my way home, I realized that this is just the end of this phase of our relationship and the beginning of the next, whatever that may be. We are forced to see one another because of work, but, as Fate would have it, she has kept us apart of late and will probably do so until we can better handle all that exists.

* * * *
All right, gotta go eat now. Nite.